This week in an old box like the kind everyone has getting moldy around the house, I found a 1987 paperback volume entitled "Raising Self-Reliant Children in a Self-Indulgent World." It is by H. Stephen Glenn and Jane Nelson, Ed.D. It was printed by Prima Publishing; distributed by St. Martin's Press. Never heard of it and never heard of them.

But having just finished the book about Abraham Lincoln by Doris Kearns Goodwin (a tremendous, monumental work), entitled "Team of Rivals," and fresh out of anything new from the bookstore or library, I decided "Raising Self Reliant Children" would be as good a sleep aid as any. But I found something in it that astonished me.

In 1987, the authors did not anticipate, could not have anticipated, the era of social media in which we now find ourselves. Yet, here is a two sentence paragraph found on page 29 of this old, forgotten edition:

Research is now confirming that dialogue and collaboration form the foundations of moral and ethical development, critical thinking, judgmental maturity, and teaching effectiveness. Conversely, lack of dialogue and collaboration between the more mature and less mature threatens the bonds of closeness, trust, dignity, and respect that hold our society together.

Their focus was schools, of course. Their chief constituency: children. The problem: a society in which modern families have no time and perhaps even less interest in talking, teaching, and tutoring one another. All that sort of thing went out the window after World War II.

Enter social media. Perhaps it is already obvious to everyone else — it wouldn't be the first time I'd be the last one to figure something out. But it seems to me social media comes close, on some level, to replacing the dialogue and collaboration that is the foundation of critical thinking and judgment, maturity and communications effectiveness. Sure, it isn't like Uncle Granddad sitting you down for a chat about values, but an online community of shared conversation has to be far better than the deafening silence (other than electronic devices that are always on in the background) in the typical home… has to be better than what passes for conversation and an even-handed dialogue in many jobs formed around a rigid hierarchy.

And here's on last thing. On the opening page of this old musty book there is this quote attributed to Eric Hoffer:

"In times of change, learners inherit the earth, while the learned find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists."

I love that because I still so often encounter people who really don't want to learn about the new world of online conversation and collaboration via the social media innovations that are changing the world in which we live and work.

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